Naina's P.O.V.
The entire car ride had my mind drifting to what's next. What after the truth?
I looked at adi trying to read his face but he was neutral. He reassured me but somewhere doubt did take its place in my mind. No matter how hard I tried to ignore it until I finally let it be, it just troubeled me even more.
We reached and I looked down. I heard adi unbuckling his seatbelt and looking at me beofre unbuckling mine. He leaned into me, gently held my chin and kissed me. I needed it. To stop the withdrawls my mind was having about knowing the truth.
"everything's gonna be okay I promise" he said pulling back.
we went in and the medium sized room with police filled my gaze. One of them looked at adi and came to us and nodded and asked us to follow him. He's got some contacts I guess. We walked in a corridor with cells on both the sides and we reached the one at the end of the corridor.
There they were. These four small walls suited them more than the lavish mansion. Aunt was trying to shoo away insects and uncle was holding his head in his hands. The floor seemed more comfortable than the lavish sofa back in the house. I've gotten used to the floor. Made friends with the floor. Adi dosen't know that yet but now he will.
"milne aaya hai koi" the police person said in a bored tone.
(Somebody's here to meet you)
Aunt's head snapped up and so did uncle's. His held shock while her's were the same filled with hatred which I never understood was for what.
"20 mint hai tumhare paas uske baad no entry" he said and left. Adi nodded and I looked at them.
(You only have 20 minutes and after that no entry will be allowed)
I took a deep breath "why?" I asked.
"I should ask myself that. Why didn't I kill you when I had the chance?" aunt said in that same tone that she has mastered now.
From the corner of my eyes I could see adi controlling himself.
"bas karde poonam" Uncle said in a tired voice. "ab aur nahi hota yeh sab. Aur nahi chupaya jaara" he said. His face held tension, frustration, guilt, anger which he can't express anymore. He's confined in every way. The same they did to me.
(That's enough now poonam. I can't do it anymore. I can't hide it anymore)
At this point hat's off to adi's patience. Mine wasn't even building up. As soon as the idea of coming here entered my mind, it went in a mode of protecting my mind hence no such reaction or emotion except one. Curiosity.
"itne saal chupaya hai, thoda aur sahi" she said filling his ears but he paid no heed to her. He got up and came to us with much diificulty and wrapped his fingers around the bars. His eyes said so much and held so much that they couldn't handle it anymore and then thet let it out.
(We hid it for so many years, a few more won't hurt)
We were standing at a distance. I grabbed a tissue from my hand and passed it to him. I didn't think much at that point.
"no use of them now. If only I could change the past, the guilt wouldn't be killling me more than the sin I committed." He said all broken.
"The sin of snatching someone's right to live because I was too selfish making mine a luxurious one" He said and now I got a very slight idea of what he was going to say next. Only that I didn't wish for it to be what I was expecting.
"I killed them naina. I killed my brother and his wife and now I wish that god kills me too." he said in a low voice and I stumbled. I choked hard audibly as the gulp got me off my feet.
Adi held me before I could fall. His hands were cold and shaky.
"why" I choked out loudly as air filled and left my lungs in a pace. My mind stilled yet it still longed for the truth.
"It all started that day in college. When I first saw savitri. " he said. His hands slipped from the bars as his body limped and slid down to the floor against the bars.
20 minutes is less but at the same time I wanted to know the truth in one go. It wasn't worth creating a havoc in my mind. I could sense that.
"Savitri was the most beautiul girl in our college. She was a fresher. Mahesh was my younger brother and he was in his 1st year of college masters and she was his junior. I was in second year. I instantly likes her and talked with her. I thought she liked me too. But no. She loved mahesh. I wasn't much into studying and was the goon type boy. On the last day of college I thought of proposing to her but she said no and said that she loved mahesh. I was heartbroken and even more when they both got married. People raised questions about the younger son being married before the elder and it became a whole lot shame for me."
He stopped and took a breath and looked down as the tears of a small portion of the past left him forever bringing more in.
"I was basically jobless. Dad had refused to give me any position in the company unless I proved my worth. So he gave me a small shop to begin with. I saw savitri and mahesh grow closer each day and my blood boiled. Then dad got me married too. It was alliance suggested by his friend and my consent didn't really matter cause I still had a lot to prove to him. Our wedding wasn't a mutual one but who cared what I wanted and soon it turned into a pressure for children. We tried but nothing and then we saw a doctor who told us that poonam was infertile. We tried IVF but it was unsucessful. We couldn't find a donor for surogacy and adoption was somthing poonam didn't agree to. We were all the more sad. Then mahesh and savitri announned their pregnancy which started poonam's jealousy which slowly began poisoning her mind. Savitri was everyones favourite and poonam craved for attention. Mahesh and savitri had twins. Non-Identical. Naina and alisha. Our laps were blessed with alisha due to dad's request on giving us a child. I can say with pride that she was the best gift I got. I swear. I loved alisha like my own daughter but sadly I couldnt give her everything she needed and wanted as a child. I was still running a shop and not earning much and the ego being hurt for so long finally took a blast."
He stopped. Letting the same process repeat itself. Even aunts eyes were filled with tears. I wonder if she's seeing things from a different perspective. Seeing something repeatedly changes something about your perception of it. Maybe she's seeing it clearly.
ALISHA!! I have a sister. A real sister. Blood was forced to be deceptive here without being given a choice. It feels unreal. How come we dont have any photos together? I do remember some very faint and vague memories of my childhood with alisha. The only ones that got imprinted in my mind were of me growing up solo in the torture.
"chalo bas. 20 mint se zyada ho gye" the police officer came back.
(OK that's enough. It's been more than 20 minutes)
No. Not like this. I cant let it ponder my mind and wreck havoc once again. I looked at him and asked for some more time but he kept refusing. Adi took him to a corner and said something to him while fetching his hand in his pocket and taking out a 2k note. Then he came back with two chairs and we sat down.
"we have enough time now for you to finish" he said coldly. Uncle nodded and continued.
"then one day the shop closed. I took a huge loan and couldn't take give it back. I came home frustated seeing their love bloom every single day. I still loved savitri and what hurt me the most that day was that I happened to see poonam with another guy. It made me burst into a thousand peices and then I committed the biggest sin of my life. I planned their death. They were coming back from a family trip when a truck hit them. Mahesh and savitri died and you became our responsibility. Unfortunately dad too fell sick and soon he transferred all his property to me. The sin was all forgotten enjoying the luxuries for the first time but naina your face kept bringing it back all again. You reminded me of savitri. You resembeled her so much that I couldn't take the pain that a child like you could give me. Poonam noticed it all and to take out her frustation she tortured naina and I let it happen. I sat there quietly. One day I found some papers in Mahesh's room about how he was going to transfer some of his property on my name. The guilt killed me like cancer. Its still there naina. Its still there. Nothing can change it ever." His eyes held painful tears as he let them out like furious river held back for long.
"naina beta mujhe maaf karde beta. Please mujhse aur sehen nahi hota" He cried holding the bar strong in his arms.
(Naina child please forgive me I can't take it anymore)
What could I say? I didn't know. I was completely numb by now. Atleast I anticipated the truth to be cruel so I didn't keep much expectations. But it feels the same as expecting it to not be so cruel and then getting hurt by it.
Numbness plus questions and I chose the latter still thinking that some part of it won't be so cruel. My vision had blurred a long time back but I didn't hold anything back and I too let it out.
All this while aunty was crying but she didn't say anything. I guess it numbed her too and for a moment I could see guilt in her eyes. The pain, the sufferings. Maybe she too couldn't hold it back anymore. She finally gave up and let guilt rest upon her.
"woh priyansha ke ghar par jo maali uncle the, unko kisne maara?" I asked trying to keep my voice steady. Somewhere I knew the answer but I just wanted to hear it.
(Who killed the gardner who worked at priyanshas house?)
"maine!" A voice came from behind.
(Me)
SAMAR!!! I didn't see him here.
He was standing there holding the bars and his face was showing what everyone's did right now. Guilt and remorse. I looked at adi. His eyes held fury. If it weren't for the bars separating these two, he would be dead by now. Not even the police would be able to stop him. His jaw was clenched and knuckles so tight and white.
"the garder had the spare keys to the house. He was coming to the basment for something when he saw blood. We had kept priyansha and her parents there for a while. I kept coming to the house often to see if anyone came and when I found the door opened I went in and saw the gardner. He was about to call the police when I killed him. He didn't come before that because he was at his village and came that day only" He said and looked up and gulped.
He's just a college student. His life is ruined even before making out something of it. He dropped his arms and went to sit back at the corner. Things were so clear now. Acceptance was my only option. How sad that i'm always given just one option in life and some people are given two yet they choose the wrong one.
I can't be grateful for anything right now. Hate towards life is what I feel now. Hate towards someone for the first time in my life. I took a deep breath in as my dried tear stiffened my face making it cold. I got up from the chair and turned to go away. I am not strong. Not anymore.
"naina!" I stilled. What does she want now? I turned around limping lifeless.
"alisha se kehna ki meri koi bhi kahi hui baat dil par na le aur ek baar merese milne aa jaye" she said the last part in hesitation. I doubt she'll even wanna remember you. I tuned to go back around.
(Tell alisha that I didn't mean a word I said to her. Tell her to meet me once.)
"naina!" she said again.
"mujhe maaf karde" she broke down joining her palms in front of me looking down. I didn't say anything and went out.
(Please forgive me)
The air filled my lungs as I choked hard and then his warmth wrapped around me and I let it all out like my furious river held back so long.
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